The CinnaBomb
Hello HPs, long time no see. HP03 ventured back to the gym last night (after a solid one month break) for what may be the most pathetic attempt at fitness in her life.
The critical background: Yesterday, HP01, 03, and 04 binged on Wendy's meals for lunch on their roadtrip to Ikea (aka Hotel California) for office storage. While at the window, HP03 felt proud of her willpower and did not order the frosty in favor of the more pratical diet soda. However, on their way out of Ikea, HP03 bought a giant $1 cinnamon roll and a large Mt. Dew (a few years ago she resolved to drink only diet sodas, but she hates diet pepsi and figured what the fuck, I'm eating a giant cinnabun I may as well go for the 300 calorie chaser).
The disaster: HP03 gets to the gym, does some sit ups while waiting for the treadmills and then hops on for a personally guided tour ride to the 3rd ring of hell. Despite the fact that she completed a marathon less than 100 days ago, one mile in, at the personally lame pace of eight.5 minute miles, HP03 was sweating profusely and gaging back the CinnaBomb that was seeking its freedom. HP03 reached for the emergency stop and tried to take a leisurely walk around the indoor track. Unfortunatly, she even cut her "cool down" short in favor of sitting with her head down in the ladies' locker room receiting, "Please don't puke, please don't puke" for about three mintues. After what shall now be known as the "bunning" HP03 couldn't face the treadmill and decided instead to work her arms and then shame her twelve-year-old-self with some illadvised jumproping for 15 mintues.
The resolution: In honor of the new year and her new found success with the "stop biting my nails" resolution of eight new years past, HP03 has resolved to eat junk food only once a day for the next three months and then every other day or something like that in the months following.
No shit, I am eating snap peas. Wee...
The critical background: Yesterday, HP01, 03, and 04 binged on Wendy's meals for lunch on their roadtrip to Ikea (aka Hotel California) for office storage. While at the window, HP03 felt proud of her willpower and did not order the frosty in favor of the more pratical diet soda. However, on their way out of Ikea, HP03 bought a giant $1 cinnamon roll and a large Mt. Dew (a few years ago she resolved to drink only diet sodas, but she hates diet pepsi and figured what the fuck, I'm eating a giant cinnabun I may as well go for the 300 calorie chaser).
The disaster: HP03 gets to the gym, does some sit ups while waiting for the treadmills and then hops on for a personally guided tour ride to the 3rd ring of hell. Despite the fact that she completed a marathon less than 100 days ago, one mile in, at the personally lame pace of eight.5 minute miles, HP03 was sweating profusely and gaging back the CinnaBomb that was seeking its freedom. HP03 reached for the emergency stop and tried to take a leisurely walk around the indoor track. Unfortunatly, she even cut her "cool down" short in favor of sitting with her head down in the ladies' locker room receiting, "Please don't puke, please don't puke" for about three mintues. After what shall now be known as the "bunning" HP03 couldn't face the treadmill and decided instead to work her arms and then shame her twelve-year-old-self with some illadvised jumproping for 15 mintues.
The resolution: In honor of the new year and her new found success with the "stop biting my nails" resolution of eight new years past, HP03 has resolved to eat junk food only once a day for the next three months and then every other day or something like that in the months following.
No shit, I am eating snap peas. Wee...
posted by Team Caliente Pantalones @ 3:58 PM
1 Comments:
At 9:24 PM,
Team Caliente Pantalones said…
Good Grief ladies, youre training for triathlons, for fucks sake!! THE SHAME! (but truth be told, I wish I could have a cinnibun RIGHT NOW...) HP02
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