Indivisible.

Cougars unite.

First, HP03 would like to share that she took a slight detour on her way to the office this morning to snap a camera phone pic of the car that was buzzing around ahead of her in the OT. A hunter green, Mercury Courgar with vanity plates that read "MY K1TTY". Grrr! While she has, thus far, been unable to retrieve said pic for the blog, HP03 will none the less take this opportunity to declare November 30th the day of the cougar.

In a solidly related note, W is all up in the cougar's territory today. Two years into the war it seems he's come up with the National Strategy for Victory in Iraq and is delivering it via a speech in a sea of blue at our beloved Naval Academy. Ah Georgie, the consummate late bloomer. Get the details here: http://www.whitehouse.gov/infocus/iraq/iraq_strategy_nov2005

Coming full circle, HP03 finds it interesting that the POTUS often espouses doctrines that ring of the cougar axiom.

"America will not impose our own style of government on the unwilling. Our goal instead is to help others find their own voice, to attain their own freedom and to make their own way." -W, January 2005

"The cougar will not impose her own style of sensuality on the unwilling. Her goal instead is to help others find their own voice, to attain their own sexual freedom and to make their own way, under (or on top of) her sapient guidance." -HP02, November 19, 2005

Word is that W has Scooter Libby holding his place in line for the mechanical bull. For reals. Check Drudge.

Not Fair!

Just because HP05’s cardio kickboxing instructor had an extra helping of stuffing and mashed potatoes and her weights class instructor had an extra piece of pie DOES NOT MEAN THAT SHE SHOULD HAVE TO PAY FOR IT DURING HER CLASSES!! HP05 does not want to become Bill Blanks, even though she tries every Monday for 45 minutes. Also, she would like to have the ability to lift her arms after her weights class on Tuesdays.

Everyone says “It’s good for you”. WHATEVER!! HP05 longs for the days when she can walk without pain in her behind and pull her hair back with ease… Gotta love the holidays!

Three Week Training Hiatus + Thanksgiving with the Moroccans = 6 lb Weight Gain for HP02

What is the Moroccan fascination with the phenomenon of the 'shot', anyway? Apparently you cant get a kamakaze in Casa Blanca. Oy Vey! Thanksgiving weekend consisted of sleeping, whooping it up, doing work, and eating out, and whooping it up, so when HP02 went to pilates lastnight she was such a mess that LatinPilatesHotPants laughed at her! Scandalous. I refuse to be such a holiday slacker! Off I go to run the stairs (there are 12 floors in this building).

Reunions

Night running deserves a quiet night - channeling a high school favorite -REM - HP06 had forgotten how much she loves running at night and in the cold (although all that pie, turkey and stuffing is weighing her down). HP06 almost tripped running across the bridge along Connecticut Ave. going towards Dupont because the view was distracting (as were the tunes on the iPod).

HP06 was a victim of her 10th-year high school reunion this holiday weekend. Purposely avoiding the actual reunion, HP06 instead met a friend at a new local bar outside Philly for a few drinks. A couple drinks and a hour later, the bar door opened and in flowed a hoard of people who all looked vaguely, and uncomfortably, familiar - it seems her high school reunion had made its way to the bar. Now, in a town with several functioning bars how did they chose the one inhabited by HP06? After several more drinks, a few shots, and many hugs later, HP06 made her way out of the bar and back home. HP06's bar choice must have been fate because for one who so purposely avoided the actual reunion, HP06 had a really great time playing remember when (hence the REM reference at the beginning - it was a high school theme song) and even gave her number to the boy she secretly loved in high school (she won't hear from him since he lives in another city but he does have it!).

A Note from NavyHotPants

NavyHotPants seems to be impressed by all the HP's. Here is a little note from her

"You gals are some CRAZY ladies! I had a blast with you at the game - you DID get those boys back home before 0200 curfew, right...? --Navy Hot Pants "

HPs, you did get the boys back in time, right??? HA!

Oh, and congratulations to the Midshipmen on their acceptance to the bowl game in San Diego!! If you need some extra HotPantsCheerleaders, you know where to find us!! Have a great time NavyHotPants!

The weekly blogger

The HP’s sure do know how to have a good time! HP05 had to add her two cents about this past weekend. First of all, HP05 must apologize for being a bit behind on her blogs. She was in San Antonio, TX last week for work. And very disappointed in the lack of ‘cowboys to take her away’. The Dixie Chicks had her hopes up…
HOWEVER, HP05 sprits brightened with the sights at the Navy Temple game. Thanks to NavyHotPants (HP05’s cousin) for the great tickets!! All local HP’s were there as well a few other HP friends. We even made so very nice ‘friends’. The only thing that can be said is Coo coo ca choo!!

As for workouts, after only eating out in San Antonio all of last week, HP05 feels like she is starting all over again, for the umpteenth time. 45 minuts of Cardio Kickboxing on Monday (or as she likes to put it, Cardio Kicking-my-ass-boxing) and 45 minutes of a totally body shop (weights included) today, HP05 will not be able to move tomorrow. Sweet…

HP Wounded During Cross Training

I woke up Sunday morning to an incredibly sore shoulder. Thinking I had just slept wrong I brushed it off assuming it would be better on Monday. Monday came and the old shoulder was still aching. It wasn't til I hopped in the pool last night to begin my 2.5 mile workout and my arms began throbbing that I realized (and by realize I mean HP01 pointed it out to me) that my bull riding days had caught up with me.
What has been billed as "the most dangerous eight seconds in sports" has more than lived up to its billing for HP04. It's tough being a bull rider. In professional bull riding, it's not if you get hurt, but rather when and how bad - fortunately this bull rider is only mildly hurt.
HP04's 4 seconds of glory has left her with a wounded shoulder. I've been told a shoulder injury - either to a rider's free arm (the arm that remains in the air during the ride) or his riding arm - is bull riding's most common surgically treated injury.
As you can see I share the same injury with another 1,008 bull riders each year! How does one cure a wounded shoulder from bull riding. Retired rodeo star Gary McDaniels says "we just took two aspirin and drank a six pack of beer when we got hurt. And if the pain wouldn't go away, we doubled up on the beer." Having drank probably 6 six packs of beer on Saturday clearly the magic lies in the aspirin which I neglected to take. Thus this Thanksgiving I will be working on healing my shoulder with aspirin and beer!!! Cross training kicks ASS!!! I wonder where one could purhcase a mechanical bull?! I think it should be our team mascot!

Happy turkey day to all HP's!

Coo coo ca choo.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1552976351/102-3557376-5832122?v=glance&n=283155&n=507846&s=books&v=glance

HP03 boycotts the boys...sort of.

I don't need no stinkin' Navy boys, I'll just steal their gear (and photos) and ride their bull.
Yee Haw!

HP04 Loves Freedom!

You HP's are some FINE lookin' Ladies

Hello Ladies! Can't wait to catch up with you all. Really - its been too long. Have I told you I know people...important people? Well I do and I can't wait to introduce you to them!

Hugs and Kisses,

Adam

Why hello Matthew!

Told you. Totally packing....for like a 3 week European vacation!

I veto HP01's brats and say we invite Matthew McC to the Navy game for some tailgaiting. He brings the franks and beans.

Butterstick

Thank you Wonkette for introducing me to pandacam. http://animal.discovery.com/cams/pandavidr.html
HP03 and I were watching this cute little baby panda roll around on the ground trying to sit up only to fall onto his side or roll backward. And then I realized I look like the fat ass bear rolling around on the ground when I'm in pilates class! So sexy! Well at least the only men in our class are middle age men who pass gas throughout class.

A Fart Free Evening at the Gym

HP04 had blissful evening free of gas at the gym last night. I started in the pool with HP03 and I must add I'm very impressed with HP03's skills. She's quite the athlete that I didn't recognize her under water - in fact my thought was "that can't be HP03. That person is swimming too fast" but it was her! I think part of HP03's success in the pool last night was not only the exceptional tips she's been getting from HP04 and HP01 but also the retirement of her 1995 purple psychedelic swimsuit (sadly the purple montster is no more). Rock on HP03 - you kick ass!!

Just as Hp03 was leaving to head to a luv'as dinner with SB (No doubt a dinner of goat meat in the jacuzzi) HP01 arrived. So HP04 kept on swimming. It was right after HP03 left that HP04 spotted (for the second night in a row) the man that likes to put it all out there at the pool. This guy wears a speedo ON TOP of his shorts and you can still see ALL his junk. Ladies I saw both cock AND balls. Why do men feel the need to put it all out there? No one wants to see that! I think it should be required that all men wear a codpiece under their speedo. I mean really is it appropriate?? Unless of course he looks like matthew - then he can wear whatever he wants!

After recovering from my cock and ball sighting Hp04 continued to swim with HP01 and ended up swimming almost 3 miles. Whooohooo HP04 - I felt great and definitely could have swam more but my arms (still sore from lifting with HP03 on Monday) were like jelly and my stomach was growling. HP01 coaxed me out of the pool with promises of enchiladas.
This is what TEAM is all about - I can't think of a better team mate than the one that makes you dinner twice in three days! There's no "I" in team but there sure as shit is "enchilada" in this team!!! I hope that when I die and am rotting in the second level of hell there are plenty of provisions for HP01 to make her kick ass enchiladas!!!

My belly full with enchilada meat I left the Welshley Arms Motel (aka casa HP01) and headed to my house. By the time I hit 395 I was quite pooped after my long swim and big meal. As I drove along I started to notice everyone was flying down 395. I couldn't believe how fast people were going...Until I looked at my speedometer and realized I was going 40 mph. WTF is wrong with me?
Summary:
Long ass swim + big enchilda man = HP04 drives like Grandma
This is me leaving for work this morning....

Team Caliente Pantalones heads to the Navy game...we're so hot, we're scorching!

Come to me my farting people...come to me!!!!

After last night's class HP04 has come to the realization that she must be a fart whisperer. I can think of no other reason for farting people to always seek me out, other than they're trying to communicate with me somehow. Now, granted I do think a good fart is funny every now and then but every night at pilates class - come on people!!!!! I'd like to once again throw out the question - What are these people eating before a class which they know involves a lot of squeezing of one's core region? Bean burrito's is the only thing I can come up with because the air just flying out of their asses. Not to mention the middle aged man HP01 was referring to was directly above my head - have you all ever had your head farted on??!?!?! It's not pleasant. Especially when trying to roll up but my stomach muscles wouldn't let me because what little muscle I had was replaced by frosted animal crackers on the marathon eating contest that was the night of camping this past weekend.
I've narrowed last night's offensive emission three types:
1. Beefy One: Sounds loud and butch, e.g., 'BRAAAMMPPP!' Smells like a cross between a decaying meadow muffin on a hot day and a fresh dog-turd. or,
2. Bunbuster: 'BRAAAP!' Sounds something like a Beefy One, except much more sudden and much more powerful. May smell either eggy or beefy. Leaves your asshole smarting. You really feel these babies. or,
3. Ripper: Sends seismic ripples to the next town. Rips the seams in the crotch of your pants. This fart genuinely hurts, and you can still feel it 20 minutes later. Anyone sitting nearby may experience hearing loss.
I think it was most like the "beefy" one. HP01, how would you rate it?

Been busy at the gym swimming and lifting (and by lifting i mean rendering my arms useless. thanks HP03. But do not fear while I can't karate chop I can still kick!!! KOTO!). Back to gym to swim tonight - killed my knee riding bike without knee brace on sunday so no running for a week - stupid bike!

In conclusion, I would just like to say HP01 makes the worlds best enchiladas. Better than any restaurant I've ever been to - I can't stop thinking about them. They were soooooo gooood! Some bad ass mexican cheesey goodness!!! I've got a fever and the only prescription in more enchilada!!!

You know you LURV me, HP03! Admit it!

C'mon HP03, swim to me, you can do it baby.

HP03 has taken on swimming. It's hard. Her first time in the pool, breathing was a major issue, but she's getting a little better. HP03 was convinced that kicking was going to be her secret weapon in the water....wrong. HP03 swims faster, smoother, and easier with the buoy between her legs so as to not be horribly distracted/drowned by her shark-chase like kicking style.

On Tuesday HP03 and HP04 learned the hard way that it's not a good idea to lift arm weights before a swim. And last night was HP03 first solo go at the pool. She made up some arbitrary workout to have goals. This routine incorporated the kicky board. Aka, the bastard kicky board. The HP swim coaches are all excited about the kick board, singing it's praises even. HP03 hates the bastard kicky board. Despite her recent accomplishments running, HP03 is breathless in the pool and her core is weak. Her immediate goal is to swim back and forth without stopping or taking on water halfway through the "forth" part.

Last night, HP03's ego nearly convinced her that HP01's hottie lifeguard at the Y was checking her out. After one of many "stop to cough up water" breaks it occured to her that perhaps he was looking at her every time she looked at him because he figured he'd have to jump in to rescue her at some point. Um, no thanks buddy. I'm just fine. *cough*spit*cough*

Huffing and puffing

After a heroic effort on the part of HP06 on Friday and Saturday night, Sunday was a total bust of a day. It involved a lot of sleeping on the couch and a short walk to get a ride into the office, courtesy of HP05. With the Jingle All the Way on December 11 in mind, HP06 is about to head out on her first post-binge weekend run. Fingers crossed she can make it down the street!

HP's & AlaskanHotPants,

I know where you live!

The Pony

Eat Shit, Pony!

HP01 spent a good chunk of time last night cleaning up the chocolate frosting from most of her camping gear because of your cupcake binge.

You bastard! We want our cupcakes back!

HP01 spots David Lee Roth Wannabe (sans hair) at Gym

HP01’s stomach muscles are in recovery mode today after 2 major events…(1) last’s night Pilates session and the treadmill comedy that ensued while weight training. Picture this…buff dude in tank top and shaved head running balls-to-the-wall on the treadmill. The guy is clearly running 9+ mph and HP01 has him in plain view as she is lifting weights. All of a sudden, he starts pounding his fist in the air like he’s at a Twisted Sister concert, and then goes into full-on air-guitar!! That’s right, AIR GUITAR, while running on the treadmill. HP01 was beside herself in laughter!

In all, HP01 completed the 3 P’s of Tuesday nights…Pilates, Pool (1 hour; w/ RedHotPants), and Pizza (cheese, of course). Like the total dork-ass that she is, HP01 booked it home to watch election returns. She may be a nerd and from the midwest, but at least HP01 saves her air-guitarring for the workplace (in her heals), not the gym. Sidenote: HP01 has been known to air-fiddle in the car with the ladies to “The Devil Went Down to Georgia,” but that's for another time.

HP03 Branches Out

Tired of being just the runner (cool as that is), HP03 is prepared to fully embraces the other elements of being a TRIgoddess. Since HP03 used to bust around Boston on her multitude of bikes (including the Cannondale that she hopes to bring down post-Thanksgiving and christen with an HPappropriate name), she feels like getting back on the bike will be, well, just like riding a bike. So....bring on the swim! Last night, HP03 and HP04 made a mad dash for Sports Authority. For HP04's amusement, HP03 paraded around in every poorly fit swimsuit they could find. Swimsuit #1, a reversible black and blue TYR filled HP03 with hope for a good fit. Unfortunately, the results had HP04 laughing on the floor. Never has a semi-C cup seen so much spillage. The HPs recognized that making the pool was a bust, but HP03 took advantage of her teammate's expertise and purchased a swim cap and goggles. Since she is yet to find a suit that fits, HP03 will pack her 23 year old ass into the swim suit she bought at 13 and will head to the pool with HP01 and HP04 for her first of many embarrassing lessons.

HP03 has struggled through the day at the office while trying to curb her enthusiasm for water sport, but she remains diligent and continues with the serious business of directing her large and powerful department.

Palisades Neighborhood: There are Hot Pants Among Us

This morning as she was breezing past all the frustrated commuters stuck in a traffic jam on her bike, HP02 had an epiphany: its bike or bust baby. No more getting nervous every time there is a forcast of rain, no searching for excuses to just drive the .5 miles to work. No time for BS. Its balls to the wall, every damn day. Who the heck cares about a little racing stripe? As I felt the empowerment that comes with making such a resolute decision, a smile crossed my face, and it was at that very moment that some girl sitting in traffic yells to me "your thong is showing!" I looked over at her and about crashed into oncomming traffic as our eyes locked and we both started laughing uncontrollably. Balls to the wall, but for the love of pete keep your eyes on the road (and your underwear in your pants)!!

Back in the Saddle Again

It feels good to be back on track ladies! Lastnight HP02 overcame her craving for sushi and sake, and instead headed to the gym for pilates and a 2 mile run. And it paid off- after much concentration and muscle control, HP02 regained her status of star student in the eyes of LatinHotPantsPilatesInstructor. All credit must be placed where it is due, however, because the salsa/tango soundtrack playing lastnight was smoking, and it made everyone in the class feel like a superstar. The treadmill almost defeated this HP lastnight, because I had a piece of banana bread before I ran, which meant WICKED side-ache for most of the brief run. Lesson learned: no eating before running. Duh. Then it was back on the bike to head home. HP02 is not looking forward to the dreary weather forcasted for the end of this week, as it is most humiliating biking in rain, especially with no fenders. I will arrive to work freezing, wet, and with racing stripes. Great.

Buzzkill redeemed?

After the embarassing and annoying series of buzzkills by HP02, she decided to attempt to redeem herself by taking HP01 on a fitness extravaganza on Sunday. HP01 drove over to Gtown, where the HPs caught the tow-path and biked to the head of the billy goat trail. There they locked up the bikes and headed for the rocks. They got about a half a mile into the hike and realized that this was going to take all day, and mid-day committments were fast approaching, so back to the bikes they went. All in all it was a 20 mile trip, 1/2 mile hike. Cross-training is the best training, in HP02's estimation. And this was the PEAK weekend for fall colors...I havent been able to stop smiling all day because of the beauty around me!!!

HP02 is officially back on the wagon. Last week the bike was the vehicle of choice for the commute to work everyday, and after one month last week was the triumpant return to the pilates studio. Or not. HP02 learned her lesson and will never lapse with the pilates again. Not only have I been sore for the last 4 days, I mean REALLY sore, but I have been replaced as the star student by girlish looking Gtown students back in town for school. The new prize student is a sophmore at Gtown and a ballet dancer. Barf.

Thus begins the birthday week. HP02's birthday isnt until Friday, but everyone should be allowed to party like its 1999 the week before their big day! Yihaw! After pilates, though, of course.

Increases in heart rates count as workouts, right??

HP05 once again likes the “non-conventional” workouts. Saturday consisted of driving up to Gettysburg for a mind workout. With the top down on her car (we call her Audrey or Harold with the top up) and the $18 cd auto tour, she and APK were on their way to have a 2 hour marathon Gettysburg tour. Well, that 2 hour tour turned into 5 hours. There is some really cool stuff up there!! While we did drive the 18 mile trek, we also stopped to climb all of the observation towers and Big Round Top. But the best part of the workout came later.

HP05 has a slight obsession with a band named Guster, who she will travel far and wide to see. They are the real reason for the trip to Gettysburg. While sitting at dinner, APK gets a look on his face. I turn around and there he is, Ryan, the lead singer. APK stayed calm, cool, and collected, unlike HP05 whose heart is beating out of her chest with nerves and mouth dropped to the floor. Words were exchanged, but not by HP05. Something came out of her mouth, but due to the look on Ryan’s face, she doesn’t think it was English. Totally NOT the way HP05 had imagined that moment. As HP05 was getting up the courage to be that cheesy fan to ask for a picture when he left, Ryan snuck out the back door. HP05’s heart sank with the realization that she scared the lead singer of her favorite band.

Not to be brought down but a little escape from Ryan, HP05 and APK headed to the concert. We were totally the old people at the college show. When did 18 year olds get so young!! AND, who teaches them how to dress!! SLUTS! Anyway, I digress... So the show was over and we realized it wasn’t their best show. Great music, but have seen better. As we walk back to the car, APK and his amazing sense of where the members of Guster are located, sees Adam and Joe on a bench. In his calm cool and collected voice, yells at them “Great show guys!”. HP05 realizes this is her chance to redeem herself and asks to be that cheesy fan and take a picture.



HP05 skips across the field to the car, giddy as the 18 year olds she was with at the concert. Between the extreme increase in heart rate in both meetings of 3 out of the 4 members Guster, and the skipping across the field, best workout EVER!!

Sunday, HP05 was still on her high from the previous day’s events and had a kick ass swim. 2000 yds straight in 36 min. Not bad for the first time back in the pool in a month! Chesapeake Bay 4.4 mile swim, I will be ready for ya!

If you stalk a Samurai be prepared to get the KOTO!!!!!!!!!

Number of dates HP04 went on with CreepyNotSoHotPantsStalker: 0

Number of Emails/calls/text messages from CreepyNotSoHotPantsStalker in the last 3 weeks: 35

Emails/calls/text messages HP04 returned: 0

Posting CreepyNotSoHotPantsStalker guys emails on blog: PRICELESS!!!!!!!
_________________________________________
HP04- I have not spoken with you in a couple of weeks (A) , so I thought that I would drop you a quick (B) note to see how things were going? Work has been very busy lately. We have been focused on CAFTA with the xxxxx taking a group of businesses to Guatemala, Honduras, and El Salvador on a trade mission, the Doha trade negotiations focused on the upcoming meetings in Hong Kong, and this week I have had to get up to speed on Avian flu, with the President's announcement on Tuesday about the request for $7.1 billion to prepare the country in the case of an avain flu outbreak. so it has been rather intersting trying to get up to speed on a couple of these issues. I also have had a bunch of family in town the past couple of weeks. My younger brother who works for xxx xxxxxxx was in town when they played the Redskins which was pretty fun. I don't get to see him all that often so it was a lot of fun hanging out with him and some of his friends from work. I tried calling you when he was in town, XXX XXX XXX. Last week I had two of my mom's cousins in town with one of their sons who was looking at colleges in the area. I don't really get to see them all that often either since they live in Denver so it was nice to see them as well. (B)

How are things going with you? I know that you were getting ready for a triathalon when we last saw each other. How did that go? How is the job going? Do you have any votes this November that are important xxx xxxxx xxxxx (since I am not invovled on any campaign, I have not really paid too much attention to this years campaigns). Well, I hope that everything else is going well for you.
Let's try and get together sometime. Give me a call sometime and we can grab a drink or dinner.
Take care and I'll talk to you soon.
___________________________________
As you can tell once again HP04 has a stalker. Seriously - why me??????? I think my mojo is WAY off!!! HP01 gets hit on EVERYWHERE we go by guys that I would be interested in but the creepy one's always seem to not only find me but latch on! So, instead of suffering alone I've decided to share this unfortunate situation with my team mates in hopes that at the very least they will get kick out of it. I apologize but some parts of email had to be blocked out....of course i'd be happy to forward the email in its entirety to any Hotpants upon request

Some points of reference and clarification - please refer to colored sections in CreepyNotSoHotPantsStalkers emails:

(A) I have not spoken with you in a couple of weeks Well that is correct doofus and
why do you think that is not true? Do I not get email? Does my phone not work?
Does my text messaging not work? Or is it that the 37th phone call might just give me a change of heart and suddenly make me interested? I don't know but you'd better try again just to be sure!

(B) QUICK??!?!?!??!! This a quick note????!?!?!?!?!? I had papers in college that were shorter!!

(B) WHO THE FUCK CARES?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!??!?!?!?!

(C) Don't you think you would know how things were going in my life if I wanted to talk to you?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!@?!?!?!!?!? I don't know maybe I would have returned the 35 emails/phone calls/text messages - but that couldn't be an indication of someone not wanting to talk to you could it???? Seriously - you mean to tell me you're 30 years old?!?!?!?! How could you have not learned in high school (or even college if you were a late bloomer) that contacting a woman repeatedly when she's not interested isn't attractive and/or appreciated. What woman finds a needy man attractive?

Brief Recap of Vegas Bday

Ahhhh Mr. Cosmopolitan my nemesis- so you have challenged me to a death match?? I must warn you I am a samurai and will defeat you and your cherry garnish friend!!!










What's that? You silly man! You AND your evil companion Mr. Hurricane are to match for me! I shall conquer you both!!!!







Victory is mine! Now take me to the palace luv'a for some goat meat!

The Best Kind of Torture

What a proper marathon story.

After running a Coach Carteresque kind of conditioning practice for my basketball team, I felt inspired to run suicides on the soccer field last night. I read somewhere that sprinting is how Jessica Simpson rocked the party for her Dukes of Hazard role. I'll let you guys know when I start looking like her. Sprinting really is the best kind of torture!

Semper Fi this!

The 30th Anniversary Marine Corps Marathon was...fun. Ha ha, just kidding. After much blogging pressure, I have more. The weekend began with HP03's parent's first Ethiopian meal, which went well. If you've never experienced Ethiopian food, you must go. You can't go wrong eating with your hands. Unfortunately, HP03 was dining dry at Dukem for dinner, which stinks because Ethiopia has this super yummy beer that tastes like honey. "Sleep" had literally been on HP03's calendar since she bought Four Months To a Four Hour Marathon and she held up her end of the bargain on Friday night.

Saturday was team dinner at AV Ristorante Italiano. The thirty minute wait served as a good time to catch up and eat roadside kettle corn. At dinner some guy at the bachelor party at the other table stood up to tell "the best story we've ever heard...." Right. Most build up and worst story ever, but it taught HP03 an important lesson, if you know you're going to be the most obnoxious table in the place, send wine to your neighbors, that way loud stories about desperate dating seem classy. HP01 and HP02 had some tall, dark and handsome eye candy behind them, but HP02 kept her mojo bottled while HP01 did her best to uncork her. Not sure if the ladies noticed, but HP03 would like to point out the severe chest hair on said eye candy. Manscaping anyone?

Race day...thank goodness for daylight savings, sort of. HP03 thought cell phones automatically reset for that sort of thing what with all the satellites and what not, but no. HP03 was up at 5:00 am. She went back to sleep just in time to have SB call to wake her up at 5:20 am. Back to sleep again. At 6:00 am HP03 finally woke up and impressed her parents with her new found morning person persona. SB apparently did not go back to bed at 5:20am, but rather stayed up working on a paper. Crazy grad students.

It was F'ing chilly at 7:00am. SB and HP03 were in the second wave start for the marathon so they were directed to go to the pentagon metro stop and then walk about one mile to the runners' village. When they got to the runners' village at 7:45 they stood in line for the port o'potties for no less than one hour. From there they walked about another mile to the start. 28.2 mile marathon. Awesome.

HP03 and SB had many fans spread across the course -- HP01, HP02, MomB, DadB, Becky, Mandy, Jennifer, Maeve, Dave, Sally, Adam, and Kirsten -- and they all truly made the race. Props to HP01 and HP02 for being ALLLLL OVER THE FREAKING COURSE!!! HP03 and SB fondly recall hearing many a cowbell ring along side the road, but the call of the HP "ayyyy yaaaay yaaaay yaaaaay" confirmed when the cowbell rang for them. HP03 is confident that the other marathoners (as she would like to now be addressed) were impressed with the team call.

There was a super hottie marine water stop, all the water boys were like movie marines. Semper Fi ma'am. I'll see your Semper Fi soldier, and raise you a makeout session in those bushes! HP03 was so impressed that she caught herself looking for someone to celebrate the hotness with. Seeing only her lova' SB she, thankfully, recognized that he may not appreciate the sentiment. Remembering she had a manfriend of her own, she switched to wingman mode (for SB, HP03 is happy to roll as Goose) and wished she carried HP02's card with her! Meeeooow!

HP03 sends big props to her mom for carrying extra goo packets and blocks and for DIVE BOMBING on to the course to hand them off! Total inner cowbell move! Props go to Maeve, for sprinting in front of HP03 and SB snapping photos and sprinting ahead. SB theorizes that it was that pace that allowed her to finish the Boston Marathon in like 15 minutes. And HP03 sends an ayyyy yaaaay yaaaay yaaaaay to the sets of fans who had the signs that said "Run you FOOLS run!" and then later, "Holy shit, you're running a marathon!"

HP03 felt like a grade A badass when she saw HP01 and HP02 and she did the signature jump/prance/spin move and heard someone say "holy shit, that chic is leaping around out there." That's right buddy, I'm an elite athlete. I punch marathons in the face!

HP03 and SB lost each other for a solid ten minutes around mile 23. It was a killer. Super stressful to think that they would not, after all the training and effort to stay in sight on the course, finish together. Both stopped, thinking the other was behind them and they lost at least ten minutes. In what would have been her last ditch effort, HP03 asked a fan is she could use his cell phone to call MIA SB. Bum didn't answer, but he did come running around the corner just as HP03 dialed again. Thanks stranger!

Mile 22-25 HP03's right knee was sure to burst. She had a conversation with herself that if, what she had convinced herself was a tendon, tore open that she would keep running and let it heal later. Can you run with torn things...?

At mile 25 HP03 was so siked up she could have run another 10k. The hill to Iwo Jima, which stood as a giant feat in HP03's mind, was nothing as she all but sprinted up it. HP03 and SB crossed the finish line hand in hand and then were draped with medals, given the "Congratulations Ma'am," and wrapped in camo-burger foil.

While the race start was frustratingly crowded, the MIA moment was stressful, and her time of 04:28:53 was just over her goal, HP03 is happy to report that the training -- a huge undertaking -- was totally worth it. She ran a freaking marathon and loved it!

Lastly, HP03 is very proud of, and thankful to, SB -- who rocks his camo-burger skirt around town.

The Humble Beginning of HP07

Congrats to HP03 on her marathon victory! That is a time to be proud of! And what a great fan club you had. Did you notice that you can actually hire a marathon support team? I saw advertisements for such support services all over the place in San Diego. Those of you who have realized how toned your deltoids can become after waving a cow bell for a few hours might want to think about hiring out your enthusiasm!

Thanks to all for deeming me worthy of the HP. Though I have done nothing recently to prove my worth, I appreciate that you see my potential. One of the reasons I was eager to join is because I’ve lost my fitness mojo. Without an event I am nothing. HP01, you are wise to publicly post your plans for kicking ass. That sort of accountability is what gets one out of bed in the morning. Rock on!