HP02 You're our white knight upon a fiery steed...

Racing on the thunder and rising with the heat. It’s gonna take a superman to sweep HP02 off her feet...

She needs a hero. She's holding out for at hero 'till the end of the night. He's gotta be strong. And he's gotta be fast. And he's gotta be fresh from the fight...

She needs a hero. She's holding out for a hero 'till the morning light. He’s gotta be sure. And it’s gotta be soon. And he’s gotta be larger than life. Larger than life!

Oh la la....Marines handing out digits...

So it doesn't roll off the tongue like 455, but give it up for...12920....HP03's bib number for the 30th Annual Marine Corps Marathon! OhhRah.

Back to Last Weekend's Triathlon

The not so slippery slope...

It has been brought-en to HP03's attention that some of her teammates are experiencing a little skin irritation due to their prolonged, high intensity workouts. Ladies, after completing my first 2.5 hour run last weekend, I can relate. The skin behind my arms felt like my older brother had flown down to DC, broken into my apartment and given me a serious Indian sunburn while I slept.These are things you don't think about until it happens to you or if some kind soul with slightly more endurance sport experience opens your eyes to the dreaded chafe and the beloved BodyGlide. It is sort of like a stiff, scent free, hair wax in the form of a deodorant-like stick. You slap it on the inner thighs, back of the arms, (guys lube up those nipples) and then you head on out and work it for hours on end. Well, for like two hours, at which point you may feel compelled to reapply.

The company's website has a link for everyday use...yeah...not sure what that's all about..."Do you ever find that your pants are so tight that you get a rash along your waist band?"

Um...hell no, we run triathlons. Chafe this.

Semper Fi Devil Dog

I bet you were thinking Marines and dessert...this post should be killer, but alas, just more sporty news:

HP03 is registered for the Quantico Half Marathon on September 24th. She will race with 1,500 other runners. The course starts and finishes at Butler Stadium and encompasses the entire Marine base...HP03 expects that this race will take longer due to the detours that are sure to pull her into the barracks every 3-4 miles...oh, wait....her BF will be running, too, keeping her steadily focused on the course, for sure.....However, perhaps he will run in an HP man-kini and be more of a caliente distraction than the fatigues...?

Oh, they are handing out finishers medals.

HP03 figures she can't really go wrong. Marines and medals? Where do I sign up?

Funny you should ask: http://www.quantico.usmc-mccs.org/sempfit/races.htm

A Proper HP Post-Competition Lunch

What? What else was I supposed to do with the left-overs from the weekend??

GAME ON…HP01 Trains for ANOTHER Triathlon!

HP01 is officially hooked on the Tri and signed up for the Sherando Lake Sprint Triathlon in Waynesboro, VA on October 15th. The event includes a ½ mile lake swim, a 19 mile bike in the rolling hills of the Shenandoah, and 5k Run. Running is not HP01’s forte, so she is in dire need of some Balls-to-the-Wall training. Fortunately, HP03 has offered to help her fellow HotPants teammate…thanks HP03!! HP01 prepared an aggressive training calendar for the next 5 weeks that includes weight training, swimming, biking, and running. HOLY CRAP!

After a near death experience with a hoopty this morning, HP01 has a true understanding for HP02’s frustration with biking in the city. HP01 had to yell a few obscenities at the MoFo for his infringement on HP01’s right-of-way…jackass! Anyhoo, HP01 started off the morning with 30 minute weight-training, followed by 30 minute biking through her ‘hood, and topped off with a rice crispy treat from Trader Joe’s (which she highly recommends).

BTW…HP01’s pool is closed for the week (BOOOOO!), but HP01 was accepted into the Pilates class beginning Sept 10 (KICK ASS!).

HP03 Tests the road surface and wind speed...

How did this photo not make the cut...?

Newsflash: TeamCalientePantalones Finishes Inaugural Naylors Beach Triathlon!

In just 3 hours and 23 minutes, TeamCalientePantalones came in 17th place among the relay teams!

After a rainy night of camping that included a carbo-dinner and noisy crickets, the Team got up at 5:00am and headed to the race site for registration and “body marking” (how cool is that?!?).

HotPants01 completed the 1.5K open water swim in the Rappahannock River in 1 hour/2 minutes!

HotPants02 completed the 40K bike in the VERY hilly roads of rural Virginia in 1 hour/28 minutes!

HotPants03 completed the 6K run through the corn fields in 51 minutes/18 seconds! HP03 brought it home for the team by crossing the finish line with style and grace!

View All Photos

View All Race Results

View Race Results for Relay Teams

TGIF

HP01 continually fields inquiries into the Team and how one can be “HotPants.” In an effort to efficiently spread the good news about TeamCalientePantalones, HP01 has purchased the domain names for www.teamhotpants.com and www.teamcalientepantalones.com, both sites take you to the Team blog.

NEWSFLASH….HP01 is addicted to gear, a common symptom of CalientePantalones! HP01 went to the Sport Authority last night and invested in a new swimsuit (because her old one is too big) and new goggles (because some fuckwit stole them from her at the YMCA). Side-note…Isn’t the Y’s big shtick that they promote values and morals to their members? I guess ‘theft of goggles’ isn’t part of the moral doctrine.

In an effort to be BALLS TO THE WALL (as HP02 would say), HP01 went to the gym to lift and swim last night. She lifted for 30 minutes (arms & shoulders), and swam for 40 minutes (sprints & breast stroke). After which, she came home to cheese pizza and a gift from CoachHotSpeedo…a new Triathlon watch!

HP02 Rides in the new Tankini 2 days before the race

HP03 couldnt have been more correct with her comment about the HOTTNESS of the tankini. What a bummer that they didnt come sooner!!! If they had, I totally would have had a CBF by now. Today I took it easy and just practiced my mount/dismount for aobut 20 minutes, in the residential area across the street. As I was running with my bike, then putting it down and jumping on AGAIN AND AGAIN (gotta practice the clip in), must have looked pretty hard core. I think that the only people who saw me were a little old lady watering her lawn and some landscapers down the way working on a yard (unfortunatly all where non-Hispanic), but YOWZA did I feel like a HOT FREAKING PANTS!!!

Today while looking around on the internet I ran across an article about the saga of the phenomenon that is Lance Armstrong. Im inspired, and veclempt!!! Who knew Lance had such a sense of humor! Check it:

http://www.active.com/story.cfm?story_id=12171&sidebar=21&category=cycling

What was I thinking? Cheryl Crow is going on the Team Soundtrack, in honor of L.A.!!!

Recon expedition

A Long Time Coming
As promised, I am finally putting the new roadbike on the blog for display. Just check out this hot speed machine!!




Last weekend HP01 and HP02 scoped out the competition course in the recently upgraded TeamMobile. Even without the new additions the vehicle is f***ing brilliant.

MoFos on the bike path

Holy moly, tonight on the bike path there were so many RUDE people. You know, its freaking treacherous to ride on the trails in the city after work. As I was recovering from a near death collision involving a sharp turn, two joggers running side-by-side and some impatient hot head MOFO on a racing bike trying to pass them before colliding with me, I got to thinking. People driving in cars around here are such impatient aholes, why would that change just because they are on a bike? Only on the bike you have less between you and the person into whom you are colliding. I think I am going to save my metro area cycling for early morning weekdays or lunch hour or something. On the weekends I am going to a country road. I have had WAY too many close calls around here. UUUGGG. Idiots!

...I dont want to be right

I have been called many things in my day, but this time I dont care what they call me...I am in love with gear, and this time with my new bike gear. After the initial fear associated with having my feet attached to the pedals passed, I have now begun making plans in my mind to go everywhere on my new bike. I even look at those dorky looking biker outfits at REI that I always used to make fun of. I'm going to have to agree with HP01: If loving hot pants is wrong, I dont want to be right!"

Back in the Blogosphere

Well girls, the good news is that after an untimely hiatus from the blogosphere, HP02 has resurfaced. Truth be told I was having a bit of a hard time not being a pussy about the new bike, and I was ashamed to admit it. It has been hard to get used to! Anyway, there is a lot of catching up to do. First of all, HP02 has been biking to work nearly every day for the last month. For three weeks that was a whopping 5 mile trip, round trip. Two days this week the commute lengthened, and instead of biking to Roslyn it was to Alexandria from Gtown. Tuesday 8/23 I biked 10 miles (after work HP01 enticed me with a trip to REI that I could not pass up; a trip that extended well into the evening and I couldnt ride home). Today was a RT commute- todays total mileage was 20. I must admit, it is a great way to start and end the workday!!
Secondly, I have been going to pilates class once a week, and doing it at home. It has enhanced my ability to stay ballanced, and to be able to better control my muscles.
And lastly I have been ripping it up in the gym. I have been doing 20 mile- 1 hour stints on the stationary bike, pushing myself so hard that sweat is dripping off my nose and stinging my eyes. NO ONE on the bike at the gym is doing it BALLS TO THE WALL like I am.

The boys can't catch me...

HP03 burned up the track in, her soon-to-be-new-hood, Columbia Heights last night. While she only ran 2.5 miles, she did it with speed and style, thanks to her trial run of the official team gear. It was so hot-t she could have stood still and burned that place up.

How HP01 Got Her Grove Back

Last night was a good night for HP01. Not only did the new REI sale catalogue arrive, but training could not have gone better. HP01 completed her mile swim in 40 minutes without any major incidents (i.e. foggy goggles, water in the ears, thoughts of cheese pizza, etc.). In addition, she lifted for 30 minutes, focusing on hamstrings and butt. HP01 rewarded herself with oatmeal raisin cookies. Groove on!

Arrival.

6:00AM...? WTF? Just kidding....sort of.....

In just 4 days, TeamCalientePantalones will be competing with 350 others in the first annual Naylor's Beach Olympic distance Triathlon!

HP01 Update: Lifted weights last night and swam twelve 100 meter sprints, each under a minute. In addition, HP02 & HP01 visited the MotherShip last night...REI! The HP's have a profound appreciation for gear, or as BikeMechanicNacho says, "You chicks are total gear-geeks!"

Congrats to HP03 who ran 15 miles on Monday...Rock On!!

Good Things Come in Three’s

First, the Team Tankini’s have arrived and they are HOT!

Second, the tent (or “tailgate cabana”) for the Element was purchased and is WAY COOL!

Last, and most importantly, HP01 is the proud aunt of “Little Bear,” her sister’s new puppy…SO CUTE!

P.S. Last night, HP01 swam ½ mile and lifted weights for an hour. Oh, and then she came home and had a Krispy Kreme, YUM!

TeamMobile...SUPER-SIZED

In an effort to impress HP03's fella (who loves the Element, but wondered why HP01 lacked the camping attachment), HP01 has purchased the mother of all camping gear...the "Tailgate Cabana!" If the TeamMobile is a rockin', don't come a knockin'.

"If Loving Hot Pants is Wrong, then I don't want to be Right"

TeamCalientePantalones is sweeping the nation! As an ambassador to the Team, HP01 traveled to the West Coast to spread the good news about Hot Pants. HP01 met up with 2 of her dear friends while on travel, one we'll call "Seattle Hot Pants," the other we'll call "Denver Hot Pants." Both SeattleHP and DenverHP were most impressed and are demanding HP Gear! SeattleHP's reaction to the Team...."If loving HotPants is wrong, then I do not want to be right." AMEN TO THAT!

Yes, HP01 has been M.I.A. from the blog due to travel. So here is the skinny...In the last week, HP01 swam 1 mile on 8/15 in 40 minutes; walked the steep hills of Seattle with DenverHP to the home of SeattleHP; swam 30 minutes in the pathetic hotel pool (TINY); biked 18 miles with HP02 at the race site; swam 45 minutes in the Rappo River (dodging children); and swam 2/3 mile at the pool last night. Needless to say, HP01 must control her ravenous appetite for all food products!

P.S. Happy B-Day to CoachHotSpeedo!!!

Busted.

HP03's Sunday run along the GTown canal was a bit of a bust. The plan was 14 miles, but ended as 12 + 2 (walking).

Post-Rocky training, everything South of her knees hurt like hell, yet after two solid days off, she ran anyway and was all over the place trying to compensate for the glory/pain that was gained/lost on the stairs.

Today is looking like another day off, a light run on the soft dirt of the national mall, or traction.

Play Me

Where to begin?? HP01 and HP02 spent the evening with the best rockstar EVER, the timeless NEIL DIAMOND. Neil rocked the house! The guy is a stud and can still sing like a champ. "America" stills sends chills up HP01's spine, and the "Sweet Caroline" was AMAZING. Needless to say, HP01 did not train yesterday and instead ate hotdogs, drank beer and danced the night away. Many thanks to HP03 (and WS, EC, & AV) for the tickets!

Tonight: Must kick ass in the pool in honor of Neil!

Duh na na duh na na...

HP03 is pretty siked about the hour she spent running up the stairs behind the Lincoln yesterday, her calves, however, respectively register their dissent.

"'Cause all I wanna do is go the distance. Nobody's ever gone the distance with Creed, and if I can go that distance, you see, and that bell rings and I'm still standin', I'm gonna know for the first time in my life, see, that I weren't just another bum from the neighbourhood."

Let them eat cake.

Last night HP03 found out the hard way that a giant, corner slice of birthday cake is not the proper fuel for a 6 mile run. Maybe that's why she felt as if her leg muscles were replaced with oatmeal. Bleh...

On a related, belated note, HAPPY BIRTHDAY HP01!

"You Can't Handle the Blog!"

Pool + Pie = An Evening with HP01

HotPants01 kicked ass in the pool last night and later celebrated with cheese pizza and cherry pie. HP01 also did some serious upper-body lifting, which assisted in the "kicking of ass" at the pool. She did, however, get in trouble for chewing gum at the pool by the teenie-bopper "lifeguard." BOOOOO!

HP01 is also SUPER F***ing psyched for tomorrow night's Neil Diamond concert. MANY thanks to HP03 (and WS, EC, and AV) for the tickets...best B-Day gift EVER! Hopefully, HP02 will have a total Renaissance in lieu of Neil's sequins, bell bottoms, and the revolving stage. WOO HOO!

HP03 Representin' in Key West!

HP03 engages a girly-man Air Force fly boy in the classic "Irish bar flex off." Girls rule. Boys drool. Boo yeah.

2:00AM X-training.

Distance run by HP03 while in Key West:

...C'mon.... It was really hot....there's so much alcohol down there.... I did some weight training on two seperate mornings....and some serious cross-training (see above)....

3 Weeks and Counting!

UNFORTUNATE NEWSFLASH: The Tankinies are on backorder until Aug. 22. BUGGER! HP01 has been ordered to stalk the tankini company until they arrive and then demand faster transport! The shorts have arrived and will be distributed at the next team meeting with our Triathlon consultant, Amanda.

The weekend was a semi-bust for HP01, who is now a year older. Swim Coach Yoda (dad) accompanied HP01 to Lake Anna for another training session in the murky water. Coach Yoda has multiple triathlon's under his belt and exposed the secrets of successful lake/river swimming..."relax and breathe." Sounds easy, right? NO WAY! "Relaxing" is a bloody hard when you can't see a damn thing and you keep running into people in the water...BOOOOOO.
But overall, HP01 improved from last weekend, completing 1/2 mile.

After the swim, HP01, HP02, CoachHot Speedo, Coach Yoda, and BikeMechanicNacho, and many more celebrated with an Argentinean Meat-Feast of short ribs, chorizo, chicken, and cake. And on Sunday, we rest!

HP02 Update: All I need is my hot pants

In the case of HP02, Nacho's brilliantly plagerized quote applies perfectly; thoughts of victory must overcome the feeling of near and certain death. The good news is that this weekend, bike expert extraordinaire-Nacho transformed a dusty little trash heap of a bike into a speed machine. The bad news is, being on the roadbike is a TOTALLY different experience then the mountain bike! Its so far down in the front- it feels like my hands & wrists are going to fall off! I nearly turned back 5 minutes into the Capitol Crescent bike trail, because I thought for sure I was going to die!! The tiny tires and light frame of the bike turns any wrong shift of weight into a huge ballance issue. I am telling you, the first 20 minutes of it was pure torture!! But once I made it to Bethesda, my ballance started getting better. I wouldnt have survived without chanting the team motto the entire time. Pretty soon ballance was the last thing I was worrying about, and could just glide along!

My total ride was only 11 miles, and I would have gone further, if it werent for my aching neck and hands!! MUST find something to cushion that pressure, because I am not going to be able to turn doorknobs tomorrow (and I think I have a permanent stiff neck). I am anxious to go on a ride with coach Nacho, so he can critique my 'form'. I have GOT to be doing something wrong!

Training Plan: This week I am going to spend time practicing clipping in- I can get the first one in when I am stationary, but it takes me 6 or 7 tries for me to get the other foot clipped in once I am moving. And I just have to practice on the new bike every day. And lastly, HP01's sagely father brought up the issue of the transition. I have to practice running down the street with my bike barefoot, to train for this critical element of the race. HP01's neigbors should be warned that next weekend she will be training for the transition as well, which means she will be running down her street in her wet swimsuit, barefoot, as her dedicated swim coach times her and the dogs cheer her on. Welcome to the neighborhood, new next-door neighbors!

I feel the need, the need for speed!

HP01 continues to work the pool, trying to increase endurance and speed. After Sunday’s abysmal training session in the murky lake, HP01 swam sprints on Tuesday totaling ¾ of a mile. She can’t seem to break the 2 minute mark in the 100 meters…CRAP!

This morning, HP01 hit the pool bright an early for a ½ mile endurance session, which timed in at 20 minutes. Bottom line…HP01 must must must increase her speed!

As the wise Nacho once plagiarized, “Faster, faster, faster ‘til the thoughts of victory overcome the fear of death!” In the case of HP01, it’s the fear of fish that must be overcome!

Weekend-O-Training

While HP03 soaks up the rays in FL, HP01 & HP02 hit Lake Anna for a dip with the aquatic life. Thanks to help from the SpongeBobSquarePants kicky board, HP02 showed off her swimming tricks to all the young men. All were impressed!

Meanwhile, HP01 made peace with the “sea” and swam a 1/3 mile. This is, of course, HP01’s first non-pool training session…it was not pretty! Her breathing was off, her kicking was off, and the f***ing goggles kept fogging up.

HP01 & HP02 followed up their lake-training with a little mountain biking. HP02 kicked some serious ass on the bike ride, despite her nausea caused by the shady coffee she consumed from mini-mart. HP01 was most impressed with HP02’s cycling abilities, particularly her extreme trail-blazing through the woods! HOT PANTS INDEED!

NOTE TO TeamCalientePantalones: Tankinies have not yet arrived. UGH!