Jealous Ladies?
People always ask why are you single? Good looking fun girl like yourself I can't believe you don't have a boyfriend...Well, let's review advances made on HP04 by the opposite sex:
Stalker Boy: Emailed and called 35 times in 3 weeks. Calls/emails I returned 0. Super creepy and actually started to scare me a little. Called me at work, called my cell, email, email, and emailed.
http://teamcalientepantalones.blogspot.com/2005/11/if-you-stalk-samurai-be-prepared-to.html
Giant Douchebag: Guy I met at a bar in Seattle who attempted to woo me with the "I'm a major lobbyist for XXXXX. I know people...important people" (ladies you can't make it up)
DHS Jackass: This was a friend of a friend who make his feelings cl
ear for me one drunken night (he was drunk, i thankfully was sober). I think it was right after he fell out of the booth at johnny rockets that he claimed to love me....sweet.
So, in his attempt to woo me sober he sent me the pictures that were meant to impress . i got this email from him "Here's my tough guy walk performed yesterday in Newark, just for you !!!" With picture on the right attached.
I replied something to the effect of "am i supposed to be impressed?" To which I got 4 more pictures with "people, important people" and finally he pulled out the big guns....an email that said "well what about the car i get to drive" with a VIDEO (yes, a video) of an unmarked suburban with its lights flashing. oh god, make it stop!
Baby's Mamma: Guy I ran into a giant that stopped me in the parking lot and told me "my baby says you remind him of his mommy and well I just think you're pretty." Hands me his card and says "call me sometime and we'll grab a drink" (there isn't enough tequilaa in the world buddy)
http://teamcalientepantalones.blogspot.com/2006/02/seriously.html
WV State Senator: Can't put his picture up but ladies...contact me directly and i'll refer you to the link for a belly bursting laugh. I still shudder with the thought...
Bible Beater (most recent advancee): a colleague (old enough to be my father) i've met maybe twice sends me this email yesterday "HP04- Two months ago your warmth and good looks gave me a real upper before a job interview. Pending a drug test and some paperwork a got the job. Thank you. Could I buy you a drink after work Thursday to celebrate" The second time i spoke to this guy we were discussing the state of his failing marriage (he was in therapy with his wife trying to work things out) and his daughter. Guess the counseling didn't stick.....I haven't replied yet because...well i've just been trying to figure out how to let him down gently - me being filled with great warmth and all (has all the OT ladies perplexed as hell). As i'm typing it i get ANOTHER email "Can I twist your arm for a cocktail". Those of you who know me well know how repeated advances creep me out - give a sister a chance brotha!
So - those are my options for men in DC. I think it all speaks for itself....and you wonder why i'm scared of men. Suck on that!
Training update:
weights: Beer curls
Cardio: Crying in my beer over the state of my love life.
Stalker Boy: Emailed and called 35 times in 3 weeks. Calls/emails I returned 0. Super creepy and actually started to scare me a little. Called me at work, called my cell, email, email, and emailed.
http://teamcalientepantalones.blogspot.com/2005/11/if-you-stalk-samurai-be-prepared-to.html
Giant Douchebag: Guy I met at a bar in Seattle who attempted to woo me with the "I'm a major lobbyist for XXXXX. I know people...important people" (ladies you can't make it up)
DHS Jackass: This was a friend of a friend who make his feelings cl
ear for me one drunken night (he was drunk, i thankfully was sober). I think it was right after he fell out of the booth at johnny rockets that he claimed to love me....sweet.So, in his attempt to woo me sober he sent me the pictures that were meant to impress . i got this email from him "Here's my tough guy walk performed yesterday in Newark, just for you !!!" With picture on the right attached.
I replied something to the effect of "am i supposed to be impressed?" To which I got 4 more pictures with "people, important people" and finally he pulled out the big guns....an email that said "well what about the car i get to drive" with a VIDEO (yes, a video) of an unmarked suburban with its lights flashing. oh god, make it stop!
Baby's Mamma: Guy I ran into a giant that stopped me in the parking lot and told me "my baby says you remind him of his mommy and well I just think you're pretty." Hands me his card and says "call me sometime and we'll grab a drink" (there isn't enough tequilaa in the world buddy)
http://teamcalientepantalones.blogspot.com/2006/02/seriously.html
WV State Senator: Can't put his picture up but ladies...contact me directly and i'll refer you to the link for a belly bursting laugh. I still shudder with the thought...
Bible Beater (most recent advancee): a colleague (old enough to be my father) i've met maybe twice sends me this email yesterday "HP04- Two months ago your warmth and good looks gave me a real upper before a job interview. Pending a drug test and some paperwork a got the job. Thank you. Could I buy you a drink after work Thursday to celebrate" The second time i spoke to this guy we were discussing the state of his failing marriage (he was in therapy with his wife trying to work things out) and his daughter. Guess the counseling didn't stick.....I haven't replied yet because...well i've just been trying to figure out how to let him down gently - me being filled with great warmth and all (has all the OT ladies perplexed as hell). As i'm typing it i get ANOTHER email "Can I twist your arm for a cocktail". Those of you who know me well know how repeated advances creep me out - give a sister a chance brotha!
So - those are my options for men in DC. I think it all speaks for itself....and you wonder why i'm scared of men. Suck on that!
Training update:
weights: Beer curls
Cardio: Crying in my beer over the state of my love life.
posted by Team Caliente Pantalones @ 2:59 PM
1 Comments:
At 4:30 PM,
Anonymous said…
A correction must be made to the description of Giant Douchebag. He was not at lobbyist. Even more pathetic, he was a staffer some NY congressman. Aren't there like 30 of them? Loser.
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