So much, so much...

Ok, the Ocho has been totally delinquent in her blogging duties, especially since she's had so much to blog about in the last couple of weeks!
First, though HP04 and HP08 didn't do a great job of documenting their experience, they made a trek down to Capitol Hill Bikes a couple of Fridays ago and the Ocho took possession of her new bike (HP04's old bike)! It was all very exciting. After they tried to sell HP08 $250 shoes and a $75 helmet, she chose the $70 shoes, the $40 helmet and some bad-ass biking gloves. Needless to say, she looks Hotttt in all of it. HP04 was nice enough to hang out with HP08 while she got her fitting done and the guy helping them said he "learned a lot" from their conversation. So, after one stem replacement, the Ocho is ready to cruise. After all of that, though, the Ocho has not had the opportunity to hit the road yet and her new bike has been doing a good job of holding down the floor in the laundry room for the last 10 days. Hopefully after this weekend's Tri season kick-off at Smith Mtn., HP08 will be able to dedicate some serious time to learning all she needs to know about biking around Virginia.
It looks like HP03 beat HP08 to the punch in posting their NH photo, but the Ocho will throw these up for good measure:






HP03 at the rally in Portsmouth.


















HP08 while the Big Man was speaking in Portsmouth.













The Big Man starting the rally off in Portsmouth






The Ocho had an amazing time in the big NH and it reminded her how much she misses HP03. HP08 has decided that it's time for HP03 to give up her crazy NH lifestyle and come home the DC already!!!
Finally, HP08 has been struggling a bit to get ready for Smith Mtn. this weekend and is a little nervous about her big return to the water. (She would insert a link to her post-Bath County post here if she knew how. It's June 27, 2006 if anyone wants to check it out.) Thanks for HP01 for loaning HP08 her wet suit! The Ocho is going to take it for her first spin in the pool tomorrow night. She's also considering joining the Masters Class at the Y, which is now meeting from 5:30-6:30am Tuesdays and Thursdays. It's supposed to be geared specifically to people training for Tris and other than sleeping, what else am is HP08 doing at 5:30am?
So, that's the update from the Ocho! The HPs will be sure to fully document Smith Mtn. this weekend and we'll miss the absent HPs!!! Here's hoping we'll all be together again soon!
-Ocho out.

Sexy-Six Checking In

HP Sexy-Six here - checking in for the first time. I am pumped about my first Tri with Team Hot Pants at Smith Mountain. I also just made a major purchase of a road bike. I went on two rides this weekend – and my bum lived to tell about it.

I would like to take this opportunity to explain how I claimed the name Sexy-Six. In college, my classmates and I did a research project at the Library Lounge where some state politicians used to gather to discuss the ins and outs of state policy.

The Library Lounge had an open mic policy, and one piano player loved the song Route 66. There were two women – with plenty of class and charm – would often sing along. While draped over the piano – singing as sultry as possible – they would change the words Route 66 to Route Sexy Six (or on other occasions – Route Sexy Sex).

These two women have been inspirations for my life. Our team’s research project was applauded in class, the many nights at the lounge helped me fall in love with my husband and I gained a new appreciation for the amazing talent of my home state.

I now hope to take this inspiration with me as I join Team Hot Pants. Though you may never find me draped over a player piano, you just might find me draped over anything standing at the finish line as I complete my first 5k.

Help from an unexpected source

After a shocking weekend of crazy boy drama, HP02 turned tragedy into triumph on the Martha Custis trail by pounding out 20 miles on the roadbike this morning. With the help of an adrenaline surge only insensitive dumb boys can create, she was proud of choosing physical fitness over champagne brunch and subsequent afternoon drunkeness.
By the way, the Smith Mountain Tri is going down this coming weekend...are there any spectators making the trek? Is anyone camping this weekend? Will travel for fire...

Confessions of a Champion Binger

HP02 would like to thank the HPs out there for not judging her and her totally sporadic approach to training and blogging in the new year. Unfortunately the maturity and evolving that is supposed to take place when a girl reaches her thirties has not yet paid a visit to this HP, and as such she remains a binger in every sense of the word. I just wish I hadnt given myself all those props a few months back about how great I was for being the only one consistently blogging. Who's the loser now??

This training report is not the most inspiring post this blog has ever seen, but rather its considered to be one step closer to getting back on the wagon. After a solid month and a half of consistent training @ the beginning of the year, HP02 got sick, was down for about 2 weeks with the black lung, and then proceeded to procrastinate, all the while living the "rock and roll all night, and party every day" lifestyle. For like a month and a half. Which in turn sank her ambition and general outlook on life. The problem with physical fitness is that while its great to talk about, it is SUCH a pain in the ass to maintain. But its just the beginning of the season, and since we simply dont have time for bullshit (or pussies) I will take after HP01 and quote the sagely Emenem: "Success is my only other motherfucking option, failures not"!!

Athletic endeavors in the near future: 15 mile bike ride to Bethesda on Saturday or Sunday, weight training and stretching on Sunday, and Combat Kickboxing with KM on Monday night. Thats right, Combat Kickboxing. I only wish I was the one who thought up such a class to offer the world with such a KICKASS name- I am SO going to listen to Emenem before it starts!

Team Caliente Pantalones Represent!

Shout out to Ocho for trekking up to the N to the H for Johnny Mac and o3!

Jane would be pissed.

Over 200 years later and women still can't be smart and pretty. And they sure as hell can't be smart, pretty, clever, insightful, snarky...

"A woman, especially, if she has the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can. "

Not so Bright

HP11 (first from right--you may not recognize her without make-up) finished her first race! With another sports t-shirt in her collection, she's feeling so much better about this semi-pro athlete thing. While the name of the race was Bright Beginnings, there was no sun at all. There was wind and rain and clouds and cold. That means, also, that the new Adventure Skirt, as published by 03, has yet to make its debut. Lucky for 11, she knows the Ocho. Running wear is to Ocho what shoes are to Imelda Marcus and Ocho outfitted 11 well. Thanks, Ocho! For you I have an extra goody-bag from the Jr League of Washington! HP11 must admit that when she woke up Sunday morning to pouring rain and whipping wind, she called her friend Julie (first from left) and bailed. Then she got back in warm bed and thought to self, If I were with TCP I could not bail. So she rose in search of her inner-Steve Prefontaine, dressed for the elements, called Julie and best of all...did not finish last!

I choose Vokda. And Chaka Kahn

HP04 hasn't been working out. I'm too fat and too unmotivated. Not to worry, the realization that I have a TRI in 2 weeks will be getting me going soon. I'm also looking forward to bike fitting Friday with Ocho!! Wooohooo!! Neeeeeewwww Biiiikkkkkkkeeeee.

I do, however, want to share with my fellow HPs all that has been keeping my busy and away from the gym. Many of you may know that i have 6 weddings to attend this year. This past weekend was my cousin's wedding. It was a spectacular Bridget Jones moment for HP04 as she stood by and watched her cousin wed (same age) enduring a weekend of questions such as "why aren't you married?"

What kind of question is that? I've been asked that question a number of times. One individual, a former boss and good family friend, went so far as to say (after i replied to the question with my standard reply "i don't know, no one's asked") "Really? Really? NO one's asked?? No on has even asked...?" A defeated 04: "Um, no"'

And to make matters worse in a conversation Monday night with a guy I'd gone on a date with, he asked if he could ask me a personal question. I said, okay. And this is the way the conversation went. From here on out we'll call him "insensitive prick" (a little background on insensitive prick: he's legally separated from his wife in the process of divorcing and has two kids. i know, i know, i know - save your judgement ladies)

Insensitive prick "you're such an amazing girl. beautiful, intelligent, funny, it would just seem that if you're not married by now either you put up walls preventing it from happening or you have some sort of skeleton in your closet that comes out later on."

04 : "what kind of skeleton?" (already deeply offended, i decided to see how deep a hole he would dig himself)

Insensitive prick: "i don't know"

04: "well, clearly you've thought about this, and if you've thought about it enough to ask the question then i would think you would have some sort of example in mind of a skeleton that would preclude some man from marrying me"

Insensitive prick: "well, like a drug problem"

04: "ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? You really think that the only reason that could possible explain why I'm not married is because I have a drug problem? Well, it would certainly make my life more interesting but how about the fact that I'm an independent woman, who has a career, supports herself and is only 31??? I'm not the one that has a problem, it's you and the rest of society that have a problem. You're the one's that look at a woman such as myself who's 31 and unmarried and assume the only reason she couldn't possibly be married is that there is something so heinously wrong with her that it repels men, rather than it being a choice that I've made. Perhaps the question you should be asking is why were you so foolish to get married?? I'm not the one who's getting a divorce 12 years and after bringing two children into this world. I think rather you should be asking me, how do i have it figured out and how am i so smart as to NOT have made a foolish mistake of marrying the wrong person?????"

I don't understand it ladies, is this 1950?? I'm sooooo tired of that question. What the hell kind of question is that??? And at what point do people begin acknowledging those that are smart enough to wait for the right thing rather than jump at the first thing that comes along? I'm the first one to admit that i want to be married, but I'm also smart enough to also know i don't want to be divorced. I'm tired of being judged. I'm tired to being looked down upon as if something is wrong with me. So, that being said I've been thinking about ways to answer that question - as it always seems to come at weddings and i have 5 more to go...please cast your votes:

"Why aren't you married?"

"I don't know. Maybe its my third nipple or my 20 toes?"

"Well, I used to be a man. Could that have anything to do with it?"

"Well, I don't want to get into anything too serious because my sex change operation is in two months"

"It could be because underneath my clothes my body is covered in scales" (shout out to Bridget Jones)

"Because 1 in 3 marriages fail. How's yours doing?" (because its always married men that ask the question"

"Bugger off"

"Because I have really bad taste in men"

"The ink just dried on my 4th divorce. I'm looking for husband #5. Know anyone?"

"I have multiple personalities and don't like to take my medication"

"Vodka and I get along better than men and I do"

Where everybody knows your name...

After a couple of weeks off for the annual Cherry Blossom trek, the Ocho headed back to the pool tonight. It was a triumphant return as HP08 swam a full half mile with only one break in the middle and avoiding as much as possible pushing off of the walls. Since HP08 has about 3 weeks to prepare for Smith Mountain, she was relieved that her first spin in the pool in a while went fairly smoothly. The only unpleasantry came when the Ocho headed back to the locker room to jump in the shower before heading home. (This was only after HP08 had to pad to the front desk in nothing but a soggy towel and her wet two-piece racing suit because the pool side was out of clean towels. Grr...) So, she saw a woman stick her bathing suit in the drying machine outside of the shower area and in an effort to be nice and helpful, as we all know the Ocho always strives to be, HP08 turns and says "Just to warn you, that machine has been known to eat bathing suits." The woman, not even turning around to acknowledge HP08's existence says in an ultra-snotty "Um, yeah, I've been around here long enough to know that." The Ocho really wanted to say "Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were I 'regular' at the Y. I guess I missed everyone yelling 'NORM!' as you got in the pool!" So, HP08 says down with the bitchy YMCA regulars and up with kindness in the locker room!!!
Oh, and one other piece of bad news for all the YMCA ladies...it looks like the hotty lifeguard may have a lady in his life. He spent the entirety of HP08's swim hanging out and chatting up a new female lifeguard that the Ocho had never seen before. This didn't stop him from stripping off his shirt around lap 25 of HP08's swim, though, which perked her right up. Meeeeoooowwww...

Could it be?

Good luck HP11!

-03

I feel like I'm taking CRAZY pills

What the hell is going on around here??? First the Council on Foriegn Affairs degrades itself by inviting EL WHORO Jolie to be a member, and now the Situation Room is quoting JT?? That's right, Wolf Blitzer just asked if "Arnold Schwarzenegger is bringing sexy back to environmentalism?” What the Fuck?

Bright Beginnings

It's a Season of Firsts for HP11: Today she makes her first blog; Sunday she runs her first 5k, the Brighter Beginnings race at Haynes Point. 7am on Sunday. For those who know her best (The Ocho and HP06) they will agree that HP11 is easily intimidated by other athletes. She fears they take one look at her and know she wore pleats, not cleats, in high school. Though she's getting much better, the initiation into TCP certainly helps with confidence, HP11 often finds strength in at least playing the part. That is why she made a very wise investment in an Adventure Skirt for running. Though Nike, it should compliment the HP TYR uniform just fine. If HP11 was more savy a blogger, she'd know how to put up a picture or at least a link to said skirt, but alas...she hopes her words provide vivid imagery when she says it's NOT pleated, short yet flattering and even if the shorts part of it get trapped between thigh-fat while she sprints, no one will see, as aforementioned fatness will be shielded by the skirt. Where it over-states in prissy, it compensates in practicality. As always, here's hoping HP11 doesn't finish last!

CherryBlossoms.com

Umm...so the Ocho was looking for a photo of a Cherry Blossom to accompany her post about her recent Cherry Blossom 10 miler experience and googled Cherry Blossoms. This is the top, highlighted link that google sent to me: cherryblossoms.com. Ummm...THAT'S CLEARLY A MAIL ORDER BRIDE SERVICE!!! All HP08 wanted was a nice picture of a pink and white flower and now she's totally traumatized!!! She doesn't even have the heart to post her story about the 10 miler. Here's her photo anyway...

Hey Bitches!

HP03 wants to know, "Why you no blog!?!"

Kill me. No wait... I can't breathe... I'll take myself out, thanks.

It's official. 03 has hit the height of her chubs. o3 knows it's not very HP of her to gripe about weight, but this is uncharted waters for 03. Plus, she is small boned, extra weight is VERY obvious on her. HP04 lent her sassy DVF wrap dress for a rehersal dinner 03 must attend at the end of the month and the try on session confirmed what 03 has suspected since she returned from her SE Asia trip.

So what did she do you ask? Well, she ran 5 miles on Sunday (can't really walk today) and said no thanks to free chips (w/sandwich) at lunch, but she also ordered, *gasp* a near-full body spanx outfit! Eek. For those of you familar with 03's anti-beauty is pain philosphy (she won't even wax) and her aversion to mere control top panties are right to suspect that she will never wear these, but 03 thought you should know that she is faking it now. Boo!

Clarification. Because politics can be stressful and confusing.

At this very moment I know four things.

While "we" support the escalation in Iraq, I mean the troop surge, I mean the *new & improved!* strategy, I know sometimes we just need a little peace.

I know sometimes we need to say nothing and be listened to.

I know this is why we camp.

And finally, I know I'd be a poorer woman if I never saw an eagle fly.

(Belated thanks DHP.)

I love me some Jelly Bellies

So, as some of you may or may not know, HP09 and HP08 have been taking belly dancing classes together for a couple of months now. HP03 started all of this belly shaking craziness last fall, but after she headed to the great white north, HP08 and HP09 kept it up and have been at it now in Beginner II since January.
Ok, so the Ocho came to a sad realization last night. Her quest to become the world's greatest belly dancer has come to an end. Her talent has plateaued. The drill sergeant of a belly dancing teacher made that abundantly clear when she told HP08 that she was doing everything wrong in front of the whole class last night. Damn those make-up classes and teachers that teach everything differently! To see a video clip of the Ocho belly dancing click here ...
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THAT'S NOT THE OCHO!!!

Ok, but seriously, this is here.
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Gotcha! That isn't either. However, that is the non-drill sergeant teacher/owner of our belly dancing studio that taught HP08 and HP09's class last week. She's like 30 years old and owns her own business with three dance studios. CRAZY!


So HP08 started this post on Tuesday after her Monday, make-up class. It is now Thursday and HP08 and HP09 had their regular class last night. The Ocho learned two things last night: 1. The Wednesday night teacher is WAY better and nicer than the Monday night teacher and 2. Belly Dancing with 2 beers in your belly makes everything so much more fun! She will still never be a belly dance superstar, but at least she can enjoy their last three weeks of class without feeling like a moron.

Here's to loving jiggly thighs, jelly bellies and beer!

-Ocho Out

I was running...

Well ladies, this post is going to be short on visual aids, but long on content pertaining to running...and belly dancing. So try to contain your excitement.
First, Papa Ocho pointed out to HP08 on Sunday that she never blogged about their harrowing journey over 13.1 miles of treacherous downtown Phoenix and Tempe in January. The Ocho offers up her apologies to Papa Ocho and assures him that the lack of blogging should not reflect her love for him or the extreme impact the run had on her psyche and spirit. So...here is goes...
Back in the middle of January, HP08 and Senor Ocho traveled out to the great state of Arizona for a little wedding planning and a lot of running. Ocho, Papa Ocho and Senor Ocho had signed up to run the PF Changs Rock and Roll (half) marathon and they had all been training through the bitter months of December. Well actually, HP08 and Senor Ocho's December was bitter, Papa Ocho's was fairly mild. Either way, all three had been training for months, but nothing would fully prepare them for what awaited them in the big city to the North, err... North of Tucson at least...
The happy couple flew in to Tucson on Friday, stepped off the plane and out of the airport to realize that it was freakin' freezing outside! It seriously was! And not just freezing from the Arizona stand point, freezing by DC standards, which meant record lows in Arizona. Arizonans didn't know what to do with themselves...pipes were bursting, plants were freezing, old people were crying...it wasn't pretty. Anyway, hoping that the world would come to its senses and praying the global warming would finally pay off, Ocho and Senor Ocho spent Friday and Saturday morning nailing down some details for the wedding and then the whole happy Ocho family (minus Sister Ocho) drove up to Phoenix to spend the night before the big race. Let's just say that Al Gore and his Oscar did nothing for the Ochos that weekend and by race time the temperature had only managed to reach about 30 degrees. HP08 had assumed that even though it was January, she would be fine in her tankini and pants for the big race. She ended up having to borrow an old turtle neck from Mama Ocho and ditch it on the side of the road about 4 miles in. So, they're freezing their Ocho's off and to make matters worse, HP08 and Senor Ocho were still recovering from their marathon pains and Papa Ocho had pulled his calf muscle just a couple of weeks before the big event. Muscles were instantly stiff and no one loosened up or had feeling in their fingers until about mile 6 or 7. At one point, HP08 took a wrong step and torqued her knee in an odd way causing the Ocho crew to walk for a few hundred feet. They could only stop running for a short spurt, though, because the cold instantly caused them to start stiffening up again. Either way, all three Ochos were able to see some scenic, and not to scenic, parts of Phoenix and Tempe and though HP08 may have been overheard uttering the phrase "Where is the GOD DAMN FINISH LINE!?!?" at about mile 12.5, they all had a good time and were pretty proud of themselves. However, to date, this is the only race that HP08 has run where she crossed the finish line and made a beeline straight for the medical tent. As soon as the Ocho digs her photos out of one of her many boxes, she will get them scanned in and posted. For now, here is a little visual to keep you stimulated:





(The start line of the 2006 P.F. Chang Rock and Roll marathon)













Well the Ocho has to get back to work, so keep your eyes open for upcoming posts on HP08, the belly dancing wonder, and the 2007 Cherry Blossom 10 mile.

-Ocho out